Tomislav {Tommy} Andric

Mislim da bih bio neopisivo sam,

nema te droge koja bi me izvukla sa dna;

i ne vjerujem da bih više izlazio van –

zaključao bih se, u samicu, u stan.

Tako se valjda nedostupan postaje,

sa stalnim osjećajem da nešto nedostaje;

ljubav je vještina o kojoj sam malo znao –

bio bih nesiguran, možda i zao.  

I ne bih na pozive odgovarao,

jer ja sam samo sa tobom to nešto stvarao;

iskreno, ne bih se sa svijetom pomirio –

jer samo sam sa tobom sve doživio.

{Inspirisano “Tvrdjavom” Meše Selimovića}

Bez kruha se može ali bez vlasti ne,

zbog nje se ubija i gubi ljudski lik;

neodoljiva je k’o čarobni kamen –

poštene vlasti nema, u tome je trik.

Sve te kukavice, laskavci, lupeži,

kadija te i sudi i optužuje;

oni su bolest na narodnom tijelu –

al‘ narod ima vlast kakvu zaslužuje.

Vampiri nam uporno sjede za vratom,

svijet se nalazi u vlasti ludjaka;

ponavljaju laži svojih prethodnika –

pa hocemo li ikad’ izać’ iz mraka?

Od vlasti se ne moze izliječiti,

puno će uzeti a malo pružiti;

ona je duh iz Aladinove lampe –

ko tu lampu drzi, njemu će služiti.

Dolaze novi, dovode svoju svitu,

da kazne, globe, ubijaju i plaše;

i tako u krug, i u nove ratove –

potjeraće i vas i sinove vaše.

Srljaju na vlast k’o leptir na svijeću,

obećavajuci nam bolja vremena;

ona ce doći kad dodju pravi ljudi –

da maknu žgadiju, braćo satrvena.

Kod komšije gori, mi pijemo kafu,

kod komšije gori pa je strašno vruće;

panika je vidim, guše se u dimu – 

al’ nama je dobro, kod svoje smo kuće.

Nervira nas buka, kvare nam idilu,

prizor nije lijep i oči nam bode.

Možda bi trebalo da pružimo ruku?

Možda bi trebalo da im damo vode?

Mi smo nedodirljivi, mi smo u redu,

iza ograde i dovoljno daleko;

iskreno, baš mi je žao tog čovjeka – 

za dan je izgubio sve što je stek’o.

Možda se nas mali igr’o šibicama?

Ili su to sami uradili sebi?

Svejedno, brkaju nam zonu komfora –

sad smo strašno ljuti, pa kako i ne bi!

Prošlo je podne, vrijeme je za ručak –

šta piti, bijelo ili crno vino?

Onda dezert, siesta i reality –

koncert, pozorište pa možda kino.

Bilo nam je dobro sve do maloprije,

i uživali smo u lijepom danu;

al’ dim je sve gušći i vatra se širi –

vjetar belaj nosi sad na našu stranu.

Thank you for asking how do I feel.

Thanks for the pitifully small donations;

thank you for your prayers with no effect

and pills for obstipation. 

Thank you for antidepressants;

without them it would be even worse.

Because of that canned, stinky fish you sent

I am still having nightmares.

Thank you for the lighter and tobacco. 

Well, the tobacco was disgusting, but anyway

thank you a hundred times for thinking of us

and for all those boxes full of useless shit.

Thank you for your friendly criticism.

I know I am still stupid and irresponsible. 

Thank you for the birthday card;

you remembered, isn’t that awesome?!

Thank you for your effort and advice,

for fighting for us from a safe distance,

because you really are a generous man.

You are a classic hero archetype.

I am healthy and good-looking,

my wife is hot, my job is great.

I sleep well, I shouldn’t complain

‘cause food has been served on my plate.

I have a house and it’s big,

I have money, I have respect –

but all good things come with a price,

all magic has a side effect.

Somebody else is in my mind;

that hidden evil Mr. Hyde;

scary monsters from who knows where;

I think they are living inside.

Sometimes I feel I’m not myself;

sometimes I want to disappear.

What’s the point, I don’t see it;

what the fuck am I doing here?

I saw that fellow on the street,

a beggar and an amputee.

The guy looked like a joyful one;

the one that I will never be.

He seemed to have nothing at all;

nothing but an innocent smile.

How can I have that piece of mind?

to feel that joy, once in a while?

I turned white in one single night,
when you said you were leaving me –
when you said you were tired
of my daily lament.

You were my inspiration,
breaking into my world so suddenly, like a police raid.
And now for the word love
I no longer have a good rhyme.

I was prone to despair
but it was easier with a bottle of wine.
Drunk at the wheel
I drove down the wrong side of the street.

Now I live with my dog
in this eerie silence of a small apartment.
I watch him often and wonder
whose eyes are sadder?

You are leaving

and you thought you would never go.

Your street is falling asleep

as if nothing has happened;

two suitcases and your most beautiful dress;

the one you’ve kept

for special occasions.

It took time; you spent a fortune

but finally, your waiting has paid off

and your wish came true.

You have decided that your failed marriage

and its attendant horrors

should be buried and forgotten.

Well, good for you!

Your mother stays here;

she doesn’t want to leave this country –

this country soaked in the blood of her ancestors –

she will die all alone on this godforsaken island.

But the funny thing is,

tomorrow no one will care

or give a shit about you.

You will be just old news,

the last victim of a forgotten war.

Any regrets? Many –

well, let’s have one for the road.

The number of people; they just don’t care.

They sleep, they vegetate, they are not there.

Turning a blind eye, there he goes again –

tell me what’s wrong with that low-minded man?

A number of people, they just ignore –

fuck the poor and just close the bloody door.

It’s a simple rule, something they don’t know,

what you reap my dear friend is what you sow.

Those people, what they did they don’t regret,

being lazy, ignorant and things like that –

they don’t take a stand, they don’t interfere,

those people are sleeping, they are not there.

Od početka svijeta živim u ovoj rupi,  

na svakom sam uglu i u svakoj kafani; 

pola litre ljutog, kada uspijem da skupim  –

i mirno teku moji i zemaljski dani. 

Kad me lupi život i ujede k’o bjesan ker, 

izlazim vani u potragu za lijekom; 

da smirim šejtana, napojim u sebi zvijer – 

i usput, bez naknade, da dam savjet nekom. 

Please explain

how honesty is energy.

Is it really

the best policy?

Living our truth –

is it harmless?

is there rejection?

or is it an alternate reality?

Please explain

how kindness is the language

which the deaf can hear

and the blind can see?

Please explain

because I have some doubt.

Do I have to touch someone?

Do I have to reach out?